Sleepless Spouse

Monday: badnews o'clock

Me: I love you, I can't wait until you get home so I can serve you a lovingly prepared meal and stare adoringly at you while you consume it.

Mr. X: I love you too, blah...blah...applicant...MEPS...hotel...dinner to go please.

What?! I slaved over a mildly warm crockpot all day, for this? WELL, I never!

Anyhow, Mr. X comes home, picks up his overnight necessities AND to-go dinner, then leaves; dooming me to a night of paranoia induced sleeplessness.

The first part of the evening goes by quickly:

-The kids refuse to eat my crockpot creation because it has "chickenth" and onions in it.
-The kids demand ask for a pizza.
-I make them a pizza because I feel badly that their father works unpredictable hours and feel that somehow making them special dinners will help them to not miss him so much. Then I feel ridiculous and guilty because nothing can replace their father, especially not a pizza, and I should know better. What kind of mother AM I?!
-B asks me why I have not yet made the granola bars that I PROMISED to make.
-I send the kids to bed and tell B that I will make granola bars while he sleeps.
-B asks me not to make granola bars without him since I will "probably forget to put in the peanut butter chips".

The latter half of the evening DID NOT go by quickly:

-I play Dynomite on Yahoo games get some housework done.
-I check on the boys.
-I turn OFF all the lights in the house.
-I turn ON all the lights in the house because, in the event of a break in, I will need to be able to see what I'm shooting at.
-I check on the boys.
-I turn OFF all the lights in the house because, in the event of a break in, my eyes will need to be adjusted to the dark in case I catch them while they are still breaking in, in which case they would be still outside, which is dark.
-I turn ON half of the lights in the house because I just feel better with SOME lights on, and the possibility of someone actually breaking into the house is VERY LOW. Besides, I can always use my shotgun, which only needs to be pointed in the vicinity of my target in order to do major damage.
-I check on the boys.
-At 2:45am I pop in Steel Magnolias and lay down.
-Mr. X calls and tells me HE can't sleep either. For some reason, this makes me feel better.
-I pass out right after Shelby gets her kidney transplant.
-I wake up to the DVD menu. This simply won't do, I need some NOISE.
-I put in Bridget Jones. I have no idea what time it was, I was afraid to look!
-I fall asleep right after Mark "is unforgivably rude" to Bridget at her mother's turkey curry buffet.
-I wake up to the sound of children jumping on their beds.

Despite my very busy night, I was still able to function efficiently the next day.(THANK YOU ZIP FIZZ!!!)

The boys and I made the granola bars WITH peanut butter chips in them. We finished our lessons, AND I prepared a delicious dinner that Mr. X was able to enjoy at HOME.

Don't you just love it when everything falls perfectly into place? :)