Monday, September 15, 2008

Three Months Later

About 3 months back I purchased a Sally Hansen Wax Strip Kit. My hate dislike for plucking my eyebrows was beginning to outweigh my desire for beautifully shaped, non-unibrows and my face was paying the price. Thinking I had finally discovered the answer to my follicle fueled problems, I brought the kit home and anxiously awaited some "free time" to actually use the stuff! Then, one day it happened, Mr. X took B to a neighbor's to play video games and J was happily watching his favorite Thomas DVD, Steamies vs. Diesels (very intense episodes). Yes! This is it! I whipped out my wax kit ready to give myself a quick n' easy eyebrow makeover. Alright, here we go!


Directions, directions...
"Wash area thoroughly to remove any oils": Check

"Rub strip briskly between hands for a few seconds": Done

"Apply the strip smoothly in the same direction that the hair grows. Stroke strip briskly a few times from top to bottom to make sure wax has adhered to the unwanted hair": Applied! Get ready to be history ugly eyebrows!
*This is where I fell into a little bit of trouble. You see, the strips are clear, the wax is clear and it is very difficult to see where a clear sticky substance has been applied to your face, especially if that clear sticky substance is being pressed upon you by a clear plastic strip that makes it look as if the entire area under it is covered in said clear sticky substance.*

"Holding skin taut...pull away quickly in the opposite direction of how you applied it.": Skin is taut, I'm ready for rip off!

5...4...3...2...1...YANK!

Oh NO!

WHERE did MY EYEBROW GO!??

I stood there, staring at the mirror in disbelief. Where there was once an eyebrow, there was now just a small, pathetic looking patch of hair surrounded by throbbing, red, BARE skin. In my hand I held the clear plastic strip, on it was two thirds of my eyebrow. I then proceeded to PANICK. Looking back, panicking was not the best thing to do, since that resulted in me PURPOSEFULLY waxing off two thirds of my other eyebrow, because in my panicked mind that was the only way I wasn't going to "look weird". (I'll let you guess how that stroke of genius turned out.)

What have I done??

What is Mr. X going to say?

I need to fix this, NOW!

I reached for a brown eyeliner and tried my best to draw on some new eyebrows fill in the gaps. Then I called Mr. X.

"Hi, I have a problem!"

"What's the matter, what happened?"

"I was trying to shape my eyebrows and I accidentally waxed half of them off!"

"You what?"

"My eyebrows! They're gone!"

When he arrived home, Mr. X did his best to comfort me:

"You can barely even tell... you filled them in pretty good."

Ummm...OK, nice try, but YOU CAN TELL, and I know this because YOU ARE PRACTICALLY CHOKING YOURSELF TRYING TO HOLD IN YOUR LAUGHTER!


Today, my eyebrows are still a little thin and my faith in home waxing a little shaken. But, I haven't given up! Last week I bought some more wax, only this time, it was signifigantly more visible AND it came with eyebrow protectors. I would tell you how that went, however, I'm just not ready to talk about it yet. I just need a little bit of time...let's say oh, I don't know, three months?

10 Helpful Hints:

Tiffiney said...

Oh my gosh...you have more guts then I do..there is noway I would wax my huge eyebrows by myself...I really should get them done...lol....I totally laughed through this post...I will be back for more :)

Britt said...

Oh honey! I know that feeling .. that panic and sinking feeling that means there is no going back and the only way you want to go forward is if you can just stay in your house for a couple months.

I'm now addicted to your blog. I'm adding you to my follow list :o) Thanks so much for dropping by this morning!

Joe Arena said...

Hahah, I'm sorry. That's hysterical though.

Valash said...

That's why I let my sister wax my eyebrows.

"The Queen in Residence" said...

Thank you for sharing that. I do not feel so bad about the Cruella look now that I have others out there that are willing to share in their beauty mishaps. So sorry about yours. Ouch!!! That had to have hurt so bad!!!
I was just thinking about what our poor husbands must be thinking when we call them to tell them all about the latest um, improvement. I bet they are glad to be guys....

wenderful said...

Too funny! But where are the pictures? Thanks for visiting my blog!

Lis Garrett said...

Oh no. If ever I was thinking about waxing my own brows, you've totally convinced me NOT to. See? A little good came out of this after all. You just saved all the blogosphere from suffering the same humiliation.

What I want to know is, why didn't you post a photo?!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Oh no! You poor thing - at least you can laugh about it. I stick with plucking - I wouldn't trust myself with wax.

Veggie Mom said...

Sorta reminds me of Mel Gibson in What Women Want. Hope everything grew back, eventually. It's a really good thing that you can laugh about this now! BTW, got a Great New Giveaway going on over at my place, to commemorate my 100th post--please stop by!

Mrs. X said...

You know, I really thought a mental picture would suffice for this particular situation. :)

 
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